Red flags are not only in love relationships. We have business opportunities that are laced with red flags, friendship red flags, academic red flags, and even pregnancy red flags. In short, there are red flags everywhere people exist or interact. Many people wait till life hits them in the nuts. Don’t let that be you. Share this information before someone makes a huge mess of their lives. Don’t repeat the popular adage, “Gyae no na )nk). Se )k) pim a , )b3san aba” which means, ” Let him do whatever he pleases, when he realizes he needs help, he’ll come back. This usually happens when it’s too late.

 

 

Let’s face it. I know this may sound crazy but honestly, women and children suffering in war-torn African countries, cities in the United States flooding, Global Warming and Climate Change, and the abduction of school children in Northern Nigeria by the terrorist group, “Boko Haram” is not the first thing on your mind when you wake up, or the last thing you think about before going to bed, right?

You probably have not given much thought to it, unless you or anyone close to you has experienced terrible events like this before, you work with an organization that is interested in these sorts of things or you have a passion that would transcend into leaving smiles on the faces of the less privileged.

You’re more likely to be worried about how to pay your rent this time around since the inflation rate increased; how to get more involved in the lives of your kids; how to make it up to a friend or colleague you offended; how to get that business running again or how to improve our love relationships. The list goes on and on.

 

Arguably, there are some things we may not be able to change naturally like; the way we smile, the way we pronounce certain words (from our native accent), our voices, and how we make people feel in our presence.

We can be more conscious about some of them, depending on the adjustments we may need to make and the results we desire.

Either way, no effort is wasted.

In any case, these red flags in your life should not be overlooked;

 

1. Living a stagnant life for as long as you remember is a huge red flag.

How boring, limiting, and destructive it must be to live in patterns, cycles that produce the same result over time. Cooking the same dishes in the same way, increasing sales with the same strategies, having the same limiting beliefs about relationships, and so on.  One word, “Dynamism”. Learn new ways of doing the same thing, if you have to, be open to criticism, allow yourself to make mistakes, and grow. Analyze your results to check your growth. I’m sure you know whether or not you’re enjoying fulfillment. Reflect and ask yourself, “What exactly is my life about”. Your answer lies within.

Read also: 15 super motivational quotes to keep you going

 

2. Being consumed in your own world.

The Bible indicates, “There’s nothing new under the sun”. Every idea you have has probably occurred to someone before. It is just that, that person may not have implemented it or failed. There’s an Akan proverb that says, “Nyansa nni nipafo) baako tiri mu”. This means wisdom is not limited to one person. Be open-minded, read, learn to be tolerant with people who have different viewpoints, and be humble enough to learn from wise people who have gone ahead of you in that field.

You’re not supposed to accept everything, it only builds your relationships and makes you emotionally intelligent. This is something I have discovered, is more important than knowing facts or being book-smart.

Some time ago, I read a post that said, “The network you make today is what your children will call, “connection” in the future”. C’mon, the narrative ought to have changed. Don’t just say you want your children to be better than you. Put things in place to ensure that it happens! I love the slogan of Holy Child Senior High School (Cape Coast, Ghana) that reads, “Facta non verba” meaning “Action, not words”.

 

3. You should be concerned if you have not added value to anyone else’s life apart from yours.

There will always be an excuse for not being there for others. The more I think about it, the more I’m convinced that no matter the stage we are in life, or the circumstances we find ourselves in, we can be of help to others. Be someone’s light out of a dark place. Refrain from making them feel uncomfortable by proclaiming it to the world. It is more honorable hearing them tell others how much help you’ve been to them.

The man who planted a thousand trees may not have enjoyed the shade but his generation would. The preacher in that small town may never have won a soul to Christ but started the process of awakening the consciousness of a drunkard; the teacher may have never gotten a salary raise but fathered or mothered many children who had challenges at home; the doctor whose mother died of cancer may not have found a cure for it; but would make sure he plants smiles on the faces of children living with cancer every day; the student may not have had enough money to pay for a good education but has brilliant ideas whiles learning to read and write on his own, the unemployed may start a business with his raw talent from zero capital…. Everyone can and should be of value.

Every day presents new opportunities to be better or worse than the previous day. As long as there is a will, you have a choice to make.

 

4. Allowing others or circumstances determine who you are–red flag.

The Bible again states, “As a man thinks in his heart, so is he”. If you don’t validate yourself, not even other people’s daily compliments will be enough to make you feel better. You’ll be like the wind; not sure how much of what others say you should work with; indecisive and always blaming others for what goes wrong in your life.

Motivational quotes will only sound nice and may work for a few days but the root of the problem will remain. Knowing who you are, shapes your thought processes, your thoughts shape your actions, and eventually give you a result. Garbage in, garbage out.

Have a healthy relationship with yourself. Take good care of yourself, as you would a loved one. That way, it spills over to other people. Don’t lose yourself pleasing others. Have a life.

Read also: How to establish your self-identity; 3 super insane tweaks

 

You can look at this from a more positive perspective. Check this out : 3 life goal red flags that actually prove you’re more successful than you think